Covert brewing

[fizzypish]

Hey all,
Haven't brewed in 6 months and starting to get the itch again. After moving country and I now reside in the land of clogs and weed. I had to leave all my equipment at home unfortunately so I'll have to get back into it with a kit brew. The issue and reason for this thread: The girlfriend hates the sight of any of the gear in the apartment. We have about 45m^2 and there is space for it. We even have a bit of a balcony area which I could put the gear during non brew times. I would need some sort of a clever breakfast bar type thingy (A high table with high stools in my language) that could hold/hide the brew bucket during fermentation. If I seal the bucket properly and run an over flow pipe to a proper amount of water (as oppose to a bubbler) that should filter any smell. Anyway these are ideas of mine..... Anyone have clever ideas from the community about how to brew without your better half having to witness any of this activity and getting pissed off cos the feng shui of the apt is ruined?
And yes, I do realize how ridiculous this thread comes across and yes I do also sound incredibly whipped  and no getting rid of her and turning the sitting room into a state of the art home brewery is not an option.
Cheers for any suggestions! 

[LordEoin]

point out how you hate all of the beer there and how you'd just love to be able to make your own clones of irish craft brews because you're so home sick.
i mean really keep at it and piss her off tons until she suggests that you start brewing to shut you up, sacrificing a little feng shui for the sake of her sanity.

[DEMPSEY]

Get homebrew magazines and babe watch magazines,( great articles). 

[imark]

She must be some bird if you're giving up all that. I say forget the beer and enjoy your woman.

[Qs]

point out how you hate all of the beer there and how you'd just love to be able to make your own clones of irish craft brews because you're so home sick.
i mean really keep at it and piss her off tons until she suggests that you start brewing to shut you up, sacrificing a little feng shui for the sake of her sanity.

No ones going to believe you're pining for Irish beer when you're so close to Begium and Germany.

[johnrm]

Buy loads of porno mags.
Litter then around the place and say that you are considering an alternative hobby...

[fizzypish]

LoL. This is some solid stuff. 

[RichC]

All joking aside FP, you need to Rohypnol ur missus. She'll even be able to help getting the brew done(and whatever else!!). Just don't let her move hot liquids while under the influence