The joke thread.

[Leann ull]

This was never go any other way, try not to cry

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1diWPlEXSg&sns=em

[Jonnycheech]

Did you hear they're already making a movie about the recent Volkswagen scandal, Tom Cruise is lined up for the lead.

"Emissions Impossible"   

[Eoin]

This was never go any other way, try not to cry

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1diWPlEXSg&sns=em

Kin 'ell that was about 45kg or more

[Eoin]

An Englishman walks into a bar, normally there'd be an Irishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman with him, but they're still at the world cup.

[DamienE]

Guy goes into a pet shop & asks if they have bees for sale.

Owner says "we have everything - how many would you like"

Guy say "I'll have 3 please"

Owner goes to his storage & comes back with bees in a match box

Guy leaves store & checks match box. He sees 4 bees & returns to the store saying he only asked for 3.

Owner says the 4th is a free-bee

[DEMPSEY]

At the prison of war camp the commandant lined up all the prisoners and announced "today ve vill have a change of underwear,you change with you, you change with you ......".

[Eoin]

At the prison of war camp the commandant lined up all the prisoners and announced "today ve vill have a change of underwear,you change with you, you change with you ......".

Ahh, the oldies are the goldies...

[Eoin]

Husband: Can you get me a beer before it starts.
Wife: What???
Husband: Fetch me a beer before it starts.
Wife: If you think that I'm going to....
Husband: Crap, it's started

[Will_D]

Pinched off of MadModers:

Some clips are just amusing others are frightening.

Will

[johnrm]

Paddy says to Mick, "I'm getting circumcised tomorrow."
Mick says, "I had that done when I was a few days old."
Paddy asks,  "Does it Hurt?"
Mick says, " Well I couldn't walk for 12 months.."

[bachus]

[irish_goat]

New BJCP guidelines up folks. 

[Will_D]

Inspired by a comment by CH on the equipment thread:

Qn: When Belgians want a baby - what do they do?

Ans: Put a pin prick in the condom!

Qn: What if they want twins?

Ans: Then they put two pin pricks in condom!

Comment to they who answer: Then you must be as stupid as the Efiin Belgies!

[cruiscinlan]

Comment to they who answer: Then you must be as stupid as the Efiin Belgies!

I feel like emailing my old linguistics prof with this one, it's almost word for word a translation of a joke in French. For those who don't know, the Belgians are seen as the kerrymen of the francophone world, so they are the stock eejit. Very rarely makes it's way into English though.

[Drum]

As a Kerryman I think I should be offended by that post. I'm not sure though because I didnt understand some of the big words you used